So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you . . .

Matthew 18:21-22, 27 & 33-35 (cf. 21-35)

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven. . . . And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. . . . Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

Tom Wright, Matthew for Everyone (Vol. 2)

The key thing is that one should never, ever give up making forgiveness and reconciliation one’s goal. If confrontation has to happen, as it often does, it must always be with forgiveness in mind, never revenge.

Why does Jesus solemnly say, in the last verse, that those who refuse to forgive will themselves be refused forgiveness? Isn’t that, to put it bluntly, so harsh as to be out of keeping with the rest of the gospel? Can’t God override our failing at exactly that point?

Apparently not. At least, I don’t know about “can’t,” but it seems he won’t. The New Testament speaks with one voice on this subject (39).