Mercy in Marriage

Dave Harvey, When Sinners Say “I Do”

Notice that Luke 6 is not a call to discrete acts of mercy, but something much broader—to a merciful disposition of the heart, to lovingkindness. Dwelling in the heart, lovingkindness preempts our sinful judgments. God doesn’t just dispense mercy. He is merciful (Luke 6:36).

Such kindness expressed to us makes a claim upon us: We are called to continue in the kindness we have received (Romans 11:22). We don’t wait to be sinned against and then try to respond with mercy. Rather, we adopt the posture of being willing to experience sin against us as part of building a God-glorifying marriage in a fallen world. Kindness says to our spouse, “I know you are a sinner like me and you will sin against me, just like sin against you. But I refuse to live defensively with you. I’m going to live leaning in your direction with a merciful posture that your sin and weakness cannot erase” (84-5).